Why can't I?
by Sebaciel-Reigns
Summary: *One-Shot* Both Sebastian and Ciel have feelings for each other, but both have their reasons not to confess to the other. When one of them finally snaps. *Unedited and written at 2 A.M* sebaciel angst/fluff


aoO Secrets Behind Closed Doors Oo

This is unedited AKA switching tenses, spelling errors, and overall crap... I wrote this at 2:00 AM last night. NEVER AGAIN! I just needed some sebaciel XD

At first both of them had tried to hide their feelings for one another, of course one of them had to snap. Sebastian Michaelis.

Sebastian broke first, because it was beginning to get painful not being able to touch his young master the way he wanted to, or tell him the things he wanted to. Sebastian had tears streaming down his face, he had mocked him self, he had also been drawn to scream in rage, because of his young master. It was unfair, why did every other couple get to flaunt their love to the world when he had to keep his a secret even to the object of his affection?

One day Sebastian snapped, he had had enough of this painful torture.

"Cieeeeeeeeel, I brought you a preseeeeeeeeent!" The young girl screamed into the mansion. As Ciel descended the stairs Lizzy was already on him, smothering him with her hugs. As Elizabeth touched Ciel so freely Sebastian was bubbling with rage beside them.

As the day wore on and the blond continued to show Ciel love, Sebastian was slowly bending, not breaking, but close. Elizabeth reached across the chess board knocked over Ciel's king. "Checkmate!" Lizzy yelled. The young earl had obviously let his fiancé win, he would have never lost if he actually had dinner arrived, they were served and everything was fine.

_Then Elizabeth leaned over the table and kissed Ciel on the cheek._ 'Why, why was she allowed to have her lips upon his skin but not me?' Sebastian thought, enraged. That's when Sebastian snapped.

The girl had done nothing wrong, really. She was just showing _her fiancé _love. What's wrong with that? Nothing, but even so Sebastian's skin crawled with envy and his heart hurt knowing he could never do that. The rest of the evening the butler was silent, too angry to speak. When Elizabeth left Sebastian was still silent, the boy had gone upstairs to his study to work and had no idea that his butler was enraged.

Soon the bell to Ciel's study rang. The butler headed upstairs towards his master's study, his steps more like stomps. The rage inside was affecting the butler on the outside too. When Sebastian opened the door Ciel already knew something was wrong. "Young master, is there something you need?" Sebastian asked with a smirk, acting as if nothing was wrong, but sad for him, Sebastian let anger slip into his tone . . .

"Sebastian what's wrong with you?" Demanded Ciel. "What gives you the right to speak to you master that way?" Ciel stood facing the demon. Sebastian was silent. "Sebastian?" Ciel was now in front of Sebastian and looking into his eyes. "What's wrong?"

Sebastian stepped forward multiple times, making Ciel's body press against the desk. Sebastian leaned in, maybe too close and put his hands on Ciel's hips and pressed him further into the desk. Sebastian leaned down even more untill his mouth was directly by Ciel's ear.

"There are _many_ things wrong." Sebastian growled, his breath fanning over Ciel's neck. Sebastian's hands wandered up to grasp Ciel's waist. "Why does she get to touch you, but _I can't_?"

"S-Sebastian, what are you doing?" Ciel asked confused about who he was talking about and why he was talking about someone touching him.

"Why does she get to embrace you, but _I can't_?" He pulled Ciel into his arms and buried his nose in Ciel's hair, breathing in the scent. Tears welled up in the corner of the demons eyes.

"Why do her lips get to grace your beautiful skin, but _mine don't_?" Sebastian asked, his voice softer now. Ciel's eyes widened as his servant's intentions became clear. Ciel pulled back slightly, their bodies still connected.

"Sebastian you don't mean . . ." Ciel trailed off, looking into Sebastian's eyes. In those eyes Ciel could see enragement, sadness, and longing. And tears? Sebastian leaned in, and trailed Ciel's face with his hands.

"I do." He heard Ciel gasp quietly. Sebastian tucked his head in Ciel's neck, he didn't want the boy to see him say this, he didn't want to see Ciel's look of disgust. "My young master, I love you." Now Sebastian's tears flowed, he knew he had already lost what he couldn't have. He pressed his head further into Ciel's neck. He felt Ciel's small hands pull him closer by the neck.

"Do you really mean that?" Asked Ciel, hope in his voice. Sebastian nodded, and pulled back, looking into his master's eyes.

"I meant it, I love you only." Ciel's face it up, his small hands pulled Sebastian closer again, and Sebastian leaned in. Their faces were so close, their noses were brushing up against each other, their breath mingling, and their eyes were closed. Ciel leaned up on his tippy toes, their faces were so close, less than an inch between them.

"I-I love you too." Ciel whispered, leaning up, their mouths touched slightly. Then Sebastian leaned down with force and their worlds exploded. The kiss was passionate and fierce, but loving and soft, everything their relationship is. Sebastian's hands found Ciel's waist and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. Ciel's hands clutched the front of Sebastian's inform. Their lips moved together, their need for each other more than ever before.

Sebastian's tongue licked Ciel's lips, asking for entrance. Ciel gladly opened his mouth immediately, the moment their tongues touched electricity shot through Ciel. Sebastian's tongue explored Ciel's mouth, memorizing. Sebastian started pulling away, knowing air was a necessity for the boy. As he did this Ciel leaned upward, an attempt to not break the kiss and let out a whimper. Their faces remained close, breath mingling. They stared into each others eyes in silent agreement that no matter what they would make this work, even if they had to keep it a secret.

"I'm glad you get jealous." Ciel said said in a playful tone.

"Jealous . . .?" Sebastian asked, perplexed. 'What emotion is jealous?' Sebastian thought. Ciel giggled, and turned away, walking out the door. Leaving the demon to follow him like a love struck puppy.


End file.
